Rants In Our Pants

2009: The Year In Tech, In Haiku

What a year for technology — and what better way to sum it up than with the ancient art of haiku.

By (@jr_raphael)

December 31, 2009

Tech HaikuTwo-thousand-nine’s been a banner year for tech. From tablets to Twitter, Bing to Jobs’ liver, we’ve seen a lifetime of change over these past 12 months.

Here’s some perspective on 10 of the top tech stories of the year, as told through haiku.

1. The Bing Thing

MS Live, now Bing.
What does that site do, again?
Let me Google it.

2. The Circuit City Shutdown

A tech giant falls.
It was big, red, and bloated.
No — not Steve Ballmer.

3. The MS-Yahoo RomanceThe Microsoft-Yahoo Romance

Yahoo gives it up.
Spreads its legs for not much dough.
Man, Yang screwed the pooch.

4. The Jobs Liver Job

Jobs gets an upgrade.
His old part had short shelf life.
Sounds like an iPhone.

5. The Tablet Talk

Tablets, all the rage.
Remember the CrunchPad flop?
Boy, was that a hoot.Lord Michael of Arrington III

6. The Killer Virus

Conficker, oh my!
Worm with all talk, no action.
Wait — that’s Arrington.

7. The Android Invasion

Android makes its play.
“Droid Does,” Verizon proclaimed.
Then Goog fucked ‘em hard.

8. The Windows 7 Launch

The magic 7.
Great next to Vista? Not quite.
Just sucks slightly less.

9. The Twitter Craze

Twitter goes mainstream.Communist Apple
Ashton, Oprah, and Iran.
Shame it always breaks.

10. The App Explosion

Apple: We get it.
One-hundred thousand apps; wow.
How ’bout Google Voice?

(Microsoft-Yahoo sperm image courtesy FreakingNews.com)






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Comments

  • kev308

    Power to create.
    Sit back, observe and report
    Yes expose them all.
    Okay I guess this ain't for everybody. Further testament to great creative talents. Loved it. Good fortune in 2010. Great stuff.

  • kev308

    Power to create.
    Sit back, observe and report
    Yes expose them all.
    Okay I guess this ain't for everybody. Further testament to great creative talents. Loved it. Good fortune in 2010. Great stuff.