The TechList: 14.Nov.2009
Perez named king of the Twits, AT&T throws more hissy fits, Twilight babe (almost) shows us her tits
1. Rodney Bradford. Facebook update frees 19 yo from jail. First time saying ‘ON THE PHONE WITH THIS FAT CHICK’ got anyone out of trouble.
2. Perez Hilton. Named most influential tweeter. Dominates Miss USA pageant. Is there anything this man can’t do, besides his own hair?
3. Wikipedia. Sued by Wolfgang Werlé for ID’g him as convicted killer. At least he didn’t threaten to beat them to death with a hammer.
4. Wolfram|Alpha. Gets gig doing math for Bing. We don’t care what Microsoft says, W|A, it’s not gonna help you score with the chicks.
5. Christian Serratos. 19-yo minx bares ass for minks, destroying productivity in offices across America. Rodents never had it so good.
6. Rupert Murdoch. 137-yo mogul to keep Google from indexing his sites. Most freak shows charge admission; why should Fox be different?
7. Intel. Claims innocence but still pays $1.25 billion to kill AMD antitrust suit. Imagine what it would have paid if it were guilty.
8. AT&T. Claims Verizon’s ‘misfit toys’ ad unfair. And if Verizon doesn’t stop this instant, AT&T will run home and tell its mommy.
9. Google. Sued by Swiss for not making Street View blurry enough. That’s nothing a few shots of Neuchâtel absinthe can’t cure.
10. NASA. Discovers 25 gallons of water on the moon. Our theory? It’s melted ice left over from the Apollo 17 kegger.
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