Rants In Our Pants

The Earth Is Ending, Says Alien-Communicating UFO Prophet

We’re all about to die, according to a self-proclaimed “UFO prophet.” It has to be true — he even put out a press release.

By (@JRRaphael)

September 15, 2009

End of the WorldConsider yourself warned: The Earth may come to an end here in about two years. That’s what a “UFO prophet” who’s been communicating with aliens since the 40s says, anyway.

The wackjob phophet, a fellow by the name of Billy Meier, put out a press release this week detailing the upcoming death and destruction of all mankind. (What — isn’t that what you would do in that situation?) In the release, Meier states that “coming environmental destruction” will lead to “devastating events” in the year 2012.

Given Mr. Meier’s qualifications, it’s tough not to believe him. As this oddly disjointed sentence kinda-sorta explains:

“Meier, who claims that his still ongoing contacts with, and information from, Plejaren extraterrestrials began in 1942 at age five, published his initial warnings about the coming dangers of global warming in 1958.”

Just so you know who we’re talking about here, the aforementioned Plejaren providing all the info is a creature called Plejaren Ptaah. Ptaah is 770 Earth years old. He’s the commander of the Pleiadian/Plejaren spacecraft fleet and holds the ranking of Jschwjsch. He also has two daughters, Semjase and Pleija, and a son named Jucata. (Think we’re making this up?)

So, anyhoozles, a cataclysm will be killing us all shortly. Please take the proper precautions. Oh, and if you do manage to survive, consider buying one of Billy Meier’s many books and DVDs, all available for purchase on the Web site conveniently provided within his notice of our pending demise.

Get fresh geek humor delivered daily: RSS | E-Mail | Twitter


  • icediver

    would it help if we put paper bags over our heads?

    • James Rodgers

      We might have to cover the bags with tin foil to be fully protected.

  • bigfoot73

    In 2012 the Earth,Moon, Venus and sun all line up with the centre of the galxy.all those fields of gravity focused together cause a massive tide, a rerun of the Flood. no environmental stuff, no aliens, just mundane astronomy.
    We're fishfood,that's it, game over.
    there is no book or DVD to accompany this message.

    • DRye

      that makes a hell of alot more sense then most of the theories out there

  • alton

    hahaha classic. i think the last two commenters missed the fact that this is FUNNY. the guy's a nutjob, as the article makes pretty clear.

    i hope the plejeriens don't come to get me now…

  • Jetoni

    no body knows when something will happen, this is unknown factor and is not our duty to determine what is coming for us, is God that decides for this, thanks

  • bigfoot73

    Sure the guy's a nutjob. Other 2012 predictors bang on about how the aliens are going to come and rescue us, or how we undergo some transformation into spiritual beings on a higher plane of existence ! That's if the Nephilim or Annunaki don't come swinging by on their planet Nibiru and enslave/rape/eat us !
    I was just pointing out that the once-in-5000-year arrangement of celestial rocks is all there is at the bottom of all this 2012 malarkey.

  • duhhhhhh

    Funny how you guys who snicker at all the UFO, doomsday stuff are ALWAYS the first to be posting idiotic, mispelled, abusive comments. I think you are all secretly attracted to this material, though you don't know why. It's also very easy to jump on such an easy story and get a quick laugh at someone like Miers, who has been a target for years (for good reasons I would agree). Get some balls and come up with some real material JR.

    • You're right — it's silly to make fun of this stuff. Let me get on the horn with Ptaah the Plejaren (assuming he can step away from his Jschwjsch duties) to see if he has any real story ideas.

  • Your Neighbor

    Before any of you dismiss what you don't know ,why don't you do some homework and find out for yourself, I bet if you look at the record of facts predicted and outcomes proven of even a small portion of the Meier case not to mention the photos ,you may sing a different tune. The whole point he makes is only proven with every naysayer and knowitall that makes negative comments about his story. The facts are evidence that humans as a whole are more malevolent than benevolent and this in itself can be proven with every news channel on the boob tube,newspaper,and stupid reality show, and religious denomonation. We as humans are too quick to judge everything and too slow to understand anything of any true value.Ask yourself when was the last time anything made sense to you that somebody was'nt making a profit on.We are all lost and have only ourselves to blame for what ever future lies ahead when we all asume no responsability.When was the last time you made eye contact with someone walking past you and actually said to them good afternoon,with a smile on your face,and likewise when was the last time their reaction was to smile back and say good afternoon back ? Have you cared about someone lately that you did'nt feel owed you something ? When was the last time you offered to help your neighbor? Get the picture?

    • Drye

      Ive done all of those this week and its only monday

      • oh, so that was you? I thought it was somebody I owed money to. sorry for diving into the bushes when you walked by.

  • Solomon

    im sure many of you here have seen the forth kind…based on true events, much of it filmed side by side with actual footage and voice recordings. Aliens speaking sumerian…i would read all you can on sumeria and thier writings and culture! laughing is healthy and the crowd often does so out of fear. You may not realise your afraid, you may not care but if you search for the answers you will understand one thing, we may not have the last laugh. Party at my place on 2012 byob

  • Destin Richter

    The Billy Meiers story is pretty incredible, but worthy of researching if you have a legitimate interest in the UFO phenomenon. As a whole, humans don't have the best track record in terms of wisdom, patience, and understanding – anyone up for an intellectually honest conversation?

  • Destin Richter

    The Billy Meiers story is pretty incredible, but worthy of researching if you have a legitimate interest in the UFO phenomenon. As a whole, humans don't have the best track record in terms of wisdom, patience, and understanding – anyone up for an intellectually honest conversation?

  • Emilio

    a galaxy all the planet the sun will be in line the earth is the last in line end all magnetic field will be disrupt some how the earth will move violent or the sun will explode son magnetic black spot that eventually will point to earth is nothing to do just sit down en relax

  • Ishma

    The end of the world prophecy for 2012 came from a miss interpretation of the mayan calendar in the early 1990s, the Bak’Tun calendar of the mayans ends and a new one begins, so all this histeria about the universe destroying us inline with our calendar dating systems is a hysterical misinformed interpretation of a very brief error in translating the mayan calendar from the 1990s, and despite the error being corrected, there are people sproating the end is near on every other website for the date 21-12-2012, when infact the mayan calendar ends on 12-06-2012 and then starts a new calendar.
    As for Billy Meier, well I have researched this guy over the years, and the claims of pleadians, personal accounts suggest that something out of the ordinary surrounds this man, but there is evidence of fakery including personal accounts of fraud, while cashing in on global suffering is not an enlightend thing to do, specially if mind over matter is now a scientific fact.
    Pleadians may be attributed to post WWII Nazi experiments still running today in the antartica, there is to much to briefly go in to this subject but I hope my comment gives someone with an objective mind thats capable of researching, a good starting point.

  • Reality

    It’s a scientific fact that the mind effects matter, and that the degree of this effect depends on the amount of minds beliving the same thing, the same is true for the mind effecting our enviroment and in these days, anyone with an incling of physics will also understand this.
    If there is no past and no future, but only the NOW, given this information how can ‘Billy Meier’ profess to be enlightened and nothing more than someone cashing in on fear mongering while at the same time ignorantly weaving the very devastating future he predicts that he wishes to leave Humanity with after his death ?
    What an ignorant lieing jerk with no proof, I used to love the idear of this mans story but it fell totally appart under scrutany, and his weak understanding of how belief effects reality is shamefull in the face of his claims.
    I would challenge him to prove anything he has ever said but he has already been flushed out as a fake with all the hard evidence, it’s like being told Santa isn’t real I know but hes just a mean old guy cashing in.