Rants In Our Pants

When Twitter Goes Down, the World Goes Crazy

What do you do when there’s no Twitter for an entire morning? We tracked down some of the most amusing answers from Twitter’s own trending topics.

By (@JRRaphael)

August 7, 2009

Twitter OutageHoly Y2K, Batman! Where were you during the Great Twitter Outage of 2009?

Seem a little overly dramatic? Maybe. But Thursday’s Twitter outage could just as well have been the apocalypse: Scores of addicted tweeters panicked when their virtual drug suddenly disappeared.

So what the hell do you do when Twitter goes down? That’s one of the hottest trending topics on Twitter today. We spent some time surfing through it to find the most entertaining answers. Here are 12 of our favorites.

(Be sure to also read 22 Reasons Why Twitter Crashed for the real story behind Twitter’s epic fail.)


Misterkins: #whentwitterwasdown some guy did some stuff and that…

Right. He certainly did.


MajorGraphix: #whentwitterwasdown i was gettin’ some head

Well, to be fair, we all know that Twitter did  “go down.” But for Christ’s sake, getting oral favors from a piece of technology? Dude, you’ve got problems.


puella: #whentwitterwasdown fiquei tentando entrar no twitter…

This translates as: “I was trying to enter Twitter.” Um, you may want to get in touch with that last guy.


VANFV: #whentwitterwasdown I turn up the TV (boring) then grab my purse and…. went Shopping, what else could I have done?

The mystery’s finally solved: The economy can be saved by turning off the Twitters.

LuckeeLuciano: #whentwitterwasdown I pooped my pants. Repeatedly.

We admire your honesty. Here’s a Wet-Nap.


louis_louis_66: #whentwitterwasdown I panicked, and tried to tweet from the toaster!

Uh, pal? Lay off the peyote.


BeerExpedition: #whentwitterwasdown I drank some of beer

While we fully endorse that activity, we might suggest you spend your non-Twittering time “studying of” the English language instead.


phillipxxx: #whentwitterwasdown i was at Gloria Jeans, raging because i couldnt tweet that i’m getting a white mocha :(

And believe us, our day was terribly incomplete without that information.


SexySkylerSexySkyler: #whentwitterwasdown it messed up something, cuz everytime I tried to tweet I got kicked off line. bad twitter. needs a spanking, do you?

No idea what you’re talking about, but we sure enjoyed staring at your profile pic.


dexteriouss: #whentwitterwasdown I realized I barely get on it enough to be affected anyway…

“Yet I still signed on the very next morning to tell everyone this…”


ronnivore: #whentwitterwasdown it was my freaking birthday. such a perfect timing. ugh. :/

You are the chosen one. Please report to @biz immediately.


andkaddice: #whentwitterwasdown Cialis $1.9 Viagra $1.1 http://www.hotmallweb.cn

Ahh…glad to see things are back to normal.


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