Rants In Our Pants

When Google’s Personalized Search Gets a Little Too Personal

Google’s Search Plus Your World reveals a lot about those crack-smoking, STD-riddled whoremongers otherwise known as your Google+ buddies. An eSarcasm exclusive report.

By (@tynanwrites)

February 6, 2012

When Google unveiled its Search Plus Your World (SPYW) feature last month, it added something special to your search results. Along with the usual ads and SEO-driven tripe, SPYW displays relevant content that’s been shared by your buddies on Google+

Knowing that such a feature is ripe for abuse – especially by certain aging juveniles who spend too much time online – Google pre-emptively censored SPYW.

The list of words Google excludes from personalized search results would satisfy even the most potty-mouthed teen.  Porn, slut, whore, suck, lick, dick, stripper, poledancer, f***buddy, dickwad, dickweed, asswipe, knobgobbler, tittylicker – all are too hot for SPYW to handle.

After that, though, Google’s censors must have taken a well deserved nap. Because the list of naughty terms they failed to censor is even more impressive.

It turns out some of the best-known Web 2.x celebs are are drunk, naked, suffering from various STDs and smoking crack with Craigslist Ho’s. Don’t believe us? Check out the following undoctored, quasi-redacted search results and see for yourself:

Don’t blame yourself Bob, it happens to the best of us. And think what a relief it will be to your wife.

Jeff: Well, that explains the last five years’ worth of blog rants. 

Tim, Tim, Tim.  Is this really what you had in mind when you invented Web 2.0?

See what happens when you hang out with Craigslist Ho’s?

Jason, what you do on your own time is your business. Still, dressing in drag and posting a video of hitting the pipe? Probably not the best idea.

Don’t worry, Craig, it could be a lot worse.

See what we mean?

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