TechSex

Scientific Proof: Dressing Like a Slut Makes You Dumber

Wearing revealing clothing causes a woman’s cognitive functioning to decrease, a scientific study finds. This is not a problem, eSarcasm assures.

By (@jr_raphael)

July 16, 2009

Sluttiness and IntelligenceSorry, ladies, but it turns out your mom was right: Sluttin’ it up makes you stupid. Some research reviewed by Psychology Today sought to understand something called the “contrast effect” — the idea that, to use the scientific terminology, people feel more attractive when they’re around uggos.

Psychologists say intragender physical comparisons happen on a subconscious level and constantly affect our mental functioning. The less you’re wearing, the more it seems to occupy your mind. And the more estrogen you have, the more intensely it occurs.

The docs set out to prove this idea with — what else? — math. Researchers first had men and women solve a series of problems while fully clothed. They found no difference between how well the guys and gals performed.

Next, though, they had everyone strip down to bathing suits. With all the bodacious bods on display, the ladies’ calculations started to suffer. They made more errors than the men and received lower scores across the board.

(Note to self: Become research assistant at this lab.)

The scientists say the gals, once exposed, were too distracted by their own physical appearances to think clearly — a phenomenon that, we might note, explains a lot of things that go down (so to speak) in the club scene. You know who you are, average-looking douchebag inexplicably going home with hot girl.

We’d just like to reaffirm, on behalf of all the world’s men, that we have no problem with this skin-for-smarts tradeoff. Sure, we like an intelligent woman. But you can always put your thinking clothes on tomorrow after we, you know…get to know each other a little better.

(Image: Photobucket)






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Comments

  • Emily DeSoto

    More proof. Sammy Jo Gyllenskog