Favorites   •   Rants In Our Pants

The 10 Dumbest Questions People Ask on Quora

Of course, there are no stupid questions, just stupid people. And many of them are on Quora, the newest social media darling. What the frak is Quora? Don’t ask us.

By (@tynanwrites)

January 19, 2011

Don’t look now, but there’s yet another Web 2.0 social media blah-blah-blah to annoy you. Its name: Quora.

Quora has been called “the next big thing” by people who like to call things the next big thing. And it has TechCrunch creaming its collective BVDs, if that tells you anything.

Like Facebook or LinkedIn, Quora lets you pose questions to complete strangers. Like Twitter, Quora lets you follow and be followed. Like Wikipedia, it’s a repository of knowledge created by its own users and ruled by a phalanx of tight-assed administrators who’ve never had sex.

The number one question on Quora, of course: What the fuck is Quora?

The following 10 stupid questions should give you an idea.

Answer: Ask them questions like that.


Answer: Not at all, provided you don’t mind if we crap in the candy bowl.


Answer: No, provided you a) live in Appalachia, and b) don’t mind if your child pees in your sink and craps in your candy bowl.


Answer: Remember all those stories about people who fall down a well and go missing for days? Kind of like that. That’s why we always bring a flashlight and 30 feet of rope on blind dates.


Answer: A great many things. But mostly they’re using vagina expanders to make your penis feel that much smaller.


Answer: It depends. Shagging Jackie Chan, for example, is like screwing a series of Chinese fire crackers. Doing it with Chuck Norris, however, is like fucking a thermonuclear explosion. We recommend the lead-lined condoms.


And also assuming the single person was his/her sister, who’s totally hot in a sexy librarian kind of way, and he/she did it in the kitchen while his/her wife was sleeping, and then again in the stairwell, but neither enjoyed it as much as they could have because he/she were trying to be quiet and he/she banged his/her head on the banister knob, and then it was kind of awkward the next morning at breakfast when he/she had to explain how he/she had gotten that nasty bump on his/her forehead?

Answer: Yes.


Answer: You forgot the bits about a) having an enormous penis, b) a severe heart condition, and c) a stipulation in your will that bequeaths your entire fortune to the woman you are with if you die in the saddle. Dude, if you’re using Quora to get laid, you must be desperate.


Answer: Fuck if we know – but that’s the last time you get to borrow our copy of the New York Times, dickhead.


Full disclosure: We posted this one ourselves. But no one ever got to answer it because – yes – it was removed by a prissy and humorless Quora admin.

Answer: You make the call.






Get fresh geek humor delivered daily: RSS | E-Mail | Twitter

Comments

  • http://twitter.com/kraziegolf Giovanni Calabrese

    Mother F-er. Now I’ve got to join this BS Quora. After all those dumb ass Q&A’s, I’m kinda hooked I guess.

  • http://b.wardje.eu/ Ward Muylaert

    It’s like yahoo answers all over again. What, that hasn’t died yet? Well, you get the idea…

  • Extrakidney

    i’ve met quora and she is bitchin hot! there was this one time I asked “you ever heard of peanut butter and a german sheppard”? and she says “dude, u talking smooth or crunchy”?
    Asked and answered. Nothing more to see here.