Rants In Our Pants

Get Your ‘Yes, Steve… I Want Porn’ Android Badge!

Steve Jobs says if you want “porn” — also known as an uncensored app store — you should go to Android. We accept his proposal. Do you?

By (@JRRaphael)

April 20, 2010

Android Porn BadgeWe like porn. We are dirty, sex-obsessed miscreants who need access to smut 24 hours a day.

Either that, or we just enjoy the idea of an uncensored, open society where a techno-dictator doesn’t decide what we can and cannot see. But in Steve Jobs‘ mind, the two are seemingly one and the same.

Jobs has a new mantra in the never-ending debate over Apple’s App Store censorship: If you want porn, go to Android. The concept first came up during the company’s iPhone 4 event, when Jobs answered a reporter’s question about why Apple doesn’t allow unsigned apps onto its devices.

“There’s a porn store for Android,” he said. “You can download nothing but porn. You can download porn, your kids can download porn. That’s a place we don’t want to go, so we’re not going to go there.”

(It’s true: You can download porn. You can also download unspeakably immoral things like satirical political cartoons, photos of girls in bikinis, and — gasp! — apps that contain competitors’ names in their titles.)

The Android-is-porn notion came up again this week, when Jobs reportedly answered a user’s e-mail about Apple’s ongoing censorship of not-even-remotely-X-rated applications. His response:

“We do believe we have a moral responsibility to keep porn off the iPhone. Folks who want porn can buy [an] Android phone.”

Well, Stevie-boy, we’ll bite: If “wanting porn” is what it takes to gain freedom of choice, then damn it, we want porn. Loads of it. And we’ll proudly tell that to the world.

If you feel the same, snag one of our new “Yes, Steve… I Want Porn” badges now. You can download the image for your profile photo/Web site/temporary penis tattoo below, or you can get it on a snazzy-looking t-shirt, sticker, or magnet here.

Thanks, Steve, for helping to clarify our dirty, dirty desires for free speech. Now, if you’ll excuse us, we’re going to go look at some porn. For real, this time.

Android Porn Badge: 300×300

Android Porn Badge (300)

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Android Porn Badge: 150×150

Android Porn Badge (150)

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Android Porn Badge: 75×75

Android Porn Badge (75)

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Android Porn Badge: T-Shirts

Android Porn Shirt

(Click to see full selection and order your own)

Android Porn Badge: Magnets, Stickers, and Buttons

Android Porn Stickers

(Click to see full selection and order your own)






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