Lines Forming Around the Block for “Magical, Revolutionary” Web Tablet
The Apple iPad? Fuck no. We’re talking about the JooJoo, which is also making its debut this week. Yes, seriously. An eSarcasm exclusive.
It’s heeeere. That dead simple <$200 Web tablet we’ve all been craving has finally arrived. Only it’s not so dead simple, and it costs a wee bit more than $200. (We’re pretty sure the ‘Web’ bit is accurate, though.)
No, not that tablet. The other one. The JooJoo. You remember — the one that used to be called the CrunchPad? (We’ll wait while you Topeka Google it. Done? Good.)
Apparently, like the developers of iPad apps, the creators of the JooJoo have been chained inside a windowless room locked away from all news or human contact, because they’ve chosen the same week to ship their Web tablet as, you know, those other guys.
Then again, these are people who agreed to go into business with Michael Arrington. ‘Nuff said.
Despite this, people are lining up around the block to get their hands on a JooJoo Tablet. Really, we swear. Check out the photos. Would we lie to you?
We spoke with a few people waiting outside to find out why they were there.
First in line, of course: Gregg Packer. He is not to be confused with Greg (one g) Packer, who as this blog post is being prepared is waiting on line for that other tablet. Gregg (not Greg) claims that he is the real champion of waiters-in-line, since he was first in line for tickets to see both Pope John Paul and The Knack in 1979. But not, apparently, first in line when God was handing out brains. We quickly moved on.
Second in line was a rabbi who thought he was waiting to buy the “JewJew” tablet. Boy was he fermisht when we told him.
Next were three homeless people who thought they stood a pretty good chance of getting a bed that night. Sorry dudes, not unless you each have $499 to spare and plan to build a shelter out of the box the JooJoo came in.
The next four people said they were in line to buy a JooJoo iPad, though one said he was also hoping to score tickets to see “Mama Mia.” We didn’t have the heart to tell them.
The last guy in line refused to talk to us, but he was wearing a fake beard and he looked extremely familiar. We couldn’t quite place him. Does anyone recognize this man?
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