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Too Little Too Latex: Government Probes Condom-Free Desires

Try this one on for size: The government is paying hundreds of thousands of dollars to research why men don’t like wearing condoms. Yes, really.

By (@JRRaphael)

June 21, 2009

Condom Study

In hard-to-believe-it’s-true news, the U.S. government is spending almost half a million dollars to crack the baffling mystery of why men don’t like wearing condoms during sex. Think we’re kidding? Think again.

The study, funded by the National Institutes of Health and being conducted at The Kinsey Institute in Indiana, tackles the sticky subject of “possible barriers to correct condom use.” Scientists will attempt to penetrate both the psychological and physical motivations for a fella begging his lady to let him — to use the scientific term — ride ‘er bareback. So far, they have $423,500 in federal grant money to find that elusive answer.

“None of us has ever actually had sex, so we don’t understand what could possibly motivate a man to want to engage in intercourse without a condom,” said Dr. Obvious, who we can only assume is leading the research.Hi, I'll be your nurse...

To solve the condom conundrum, the researchers will first ask men about “various issues of arousal and sensation, including physical experience and perceptions about condoms,” the official project description explains. They’ll then head into the lab to measure “penile erection and sensitivity during condom application.” (The nurse at right, in our minds, will be performing those measurements.)

In a related development, the government is reportedly considering a $1.2 million study to discover why men enjoy receiving blowjobs.

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