Alternate Reality

Mysterious Barriers Halt Traffic in San Francisco

Barriers in the form of Robert Scoble have begun spontaneously appearing on city streets, halting traffic and frightening small children. eSarcasm investigates.

By (@tynanwrites)

February 8, 2010

The story you're about to read is not (entirely) true. It is, however, more accurate than most things on network television.

In a city known for wearing its weirdness on its puffy floral sleeves, San Francisco is in the throes of a phenomenon even longtime residents can’t recall ever encountering.  

Traffic barriers in the shape of social media mascot Robert Scoble have begun spontaneously appearing on the streets of The City, eSarcasm has learned.

As these photos indicate, barriers resembling the pudgy-yet-unselfconscious Scoble seem to appear at random, though they may be triggered by the douchebag behavior of the person behind the wheel.

"It’s just like it was in Tiananmen Square back in 1989, except for the complete lack of Chinese people, tanks, social protest, brutal repression, or the cost in human lives," said one observer who declined to give his name but offered to sell us a hot Apple iPad out of the trunk of his car. "I mean, at least what I saw of it on YouTube."

The unsightly impediments are said to vanish once the douchebag behavior has abated, though where they go remains a mystery.

City officials are puzzled by the appearance of the Sco-Barriers, as they have come to be known, but expressed relief that –  so far at least — all of the barriers that have appeared have been fully clothed.

Photos: TechCrunch

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