Alternate Reality

Supreme Court of Irony Investigating Lawsuit

A site famous for spamming customers has just won a $200,000 lawsuit against a spammer. eSarcasm digs up exclusive information on how this unlikely ruling occurred.

By (@JRRaphael)

January 29, 2010

The story you're about to read is not (entirely) true. It is, however, more accurate than most things on network television.

The U.S. district judge who awarded $200,000 to in a lawsuit against a spammer now says he was only kidding, according to new information obtained exclusively by eSarcasm.

“Look, we all know is one of the Web’s worst spam spewers,” Judge William Alsup of the Northern District of California tells eSarcasm. “When they tried to sue someone else for spamming, I thought it’d be a gas to play along — I didn’t think anyone would actually take it seriously.”

Alsup now appears to be in a quandary; his ruling, meant in jest, has been published by and picked up by numerous media outlets.

“Tagged protects its members’ privacy vigorously,” the site’s official blog says. “Except for when we send them incessant misleading e-mails ourselves — that’s different,” it neglects to mention.

Just a couple of months ago, Tagged paid $750,000 in a double set of settlements with the New York attorney general and the Texas attorney general. The settlements were made to “resolve charges that the social networking site tricked members into providing personal details to lure new members and send out tens of millions of spam emails,” according to Reuters.

“Unsuspecting users had no idea that Tagged had hijacked the e-mail addresses of their colleagues, families and friends for the purpose of blasting them with spam,” New York Attorney General Andrew Cuomo said.

“It’s hilarious now that, two months later, these same assholes are suing someone else for doing the same thing,” he did not add.

In addition to the company’s blog announcement, eSarcasm has learned Tagged is planning to send out a new series of unsolicited e-mails to everyone who’s ever registered on the site. The e-mails will boast about the “legal victory” and suggest the users come back to find the many long-lost friends trying to track them down — who, for some strange reason, haven’t tried just looking them up on Facebook.

(Judge cartoon courtesy of

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