Fresh Off The Griddle

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Been burned by Match.com? Is eHarmony a bit out of tune? Let our guide help you figure out the right way to read those lonely hearts ads.

eSarcasm in Late-Stage Negotiations to Acquire TechCrunch

eSarcasm in Late-Stage Negotiations to Acquire TechCrunch

Yes, TC is apparently for sale, and we’re apparently buying them. Even we can’t keep these things straight.

The 12 Greatest Geek Tattoos

The 12 Greatest Geek Tattoos

Kat Von D’s got nothing on these ink-loving geeks. From a midriff-placed Konami code to a Zelda-inspired tramp stamp, here are our picks for the 12 greatest geek tattoos around.

We’re Suing Apple, Michael Arrington, and 8 Others

We’re Suing Apple, Michael Arrington, and 8 Others

eSarcasm LLC would like to formally announce lawsuits against Michael Arrington, Apple, AT&T, and a bunch of other places that are really starting to piss us off.

    eSarcasm Widgets

eSarcasm Spotlight

Nipped & Tucked: 8 New iPhone Plastic Surgery Apps

Nipped & Tucked: 8 New iPhone Plastic Surgery Apps

Do you iHate your iNose? These new iPhone apps can spare you the pain and cost of plastic surgery. An eSarcasm special report.

Quickies

iToons: Twitter’s Real Ad Strategy

iToons: Twitter’s Real Ad Strategy

Forget all that crap about promoted tweets — this is how Twitter’s really planning to make money.

Hump Day Hottie: Alicia Rountree-Wilson

Hump Day Hottie: Alicia Rountree-Wilson

The Number One argument for marrying the boss’s daughter: Alicia Rountree-Wilson

Hump Day Hottie: Jenn Sterger

Hump Day Hottie: Jenn Sterger

Meet Brett Favre’s favorite email correspondent, Jenn Sterger.

iToons: The Social Media Sobriety Test

iToons: The Social Media Sobriety Test

Pulled over for drunk driving? Get ready for the field sobriety test of the future.

More Recent Stories

Upgrade Emotions: A Platform-By-Platform Analysis

Upgrade Emotions: A Platform-By-Platform Analysis

Upgrades elicit different emotions for different platforms. This highly scientific chart explains the most common reactions to a new system upgrade from owners of iOS, Android, and Windows devices.

The 18 Commandments of the Internet Comment Troll

The 18 Commandments of the Internet Comment Troll

Internet Comment Trolls, your secrets are out! We’ve uncovered a highly confidential document detailing the rules that guide everything Internet Comment Trolls say and do. An eSarcasm exclusive.

NORAD Accidentally Fires on Santa

NORAD Accidentally Fires on Santa

Air defense command officials say a nuclear missile narrowly avoided taking out Father Christmas this morning as he delivered toys to the children of the Far East. Google may be to blame.

Santa Claus Denies Sexual Harassment Allegations

Santa Claus Denies Sexual Harassment Allegations

Beloved children’s icon vehemently denies charges that he forced elves to sit on his lap and spread their Christmas cheer. An exclusive report.

Scientists Discover New Element Based on Michael Arrington, Apologize Profusely Afterwards

Scientists Discover New Element Based on Michael Arrington, Apologize Profusely Afterwards

Urasium, an ignoble gas based on superheated emissions from the former TechCrunch founder, has become the 116th element in the Periodic Table. A nation of chemists mourn.

Five People You Really Don’t Want to See Naked and Yet Here They Are – Naked

Five People You Really Don’t Want to See Naked and Yet Here They Are – Naked

Even worse, they’re all guys. Can we do SEO or what?

Snowden Meets Seuss: Oh, The Places He’ll Go

Snowden Meets Seuss: Oh, The Places He’ll Go

Where do you go when you’re Edward Snowden? Here’s some advice from the late great Dr. Seuss.


eSarcasm Favorites

The Best & the Brightest: The eSarcasm 50

The Best & the Brightest: The eSarcasm 50

Screw Michael Arrington and his TechCrunch 50. The hottest tech startups shared their throbbing demo love at eSarc50. Meet the winners: HipHype, TwitWit, and the SuckMaster 5000.

What Your Typing Style Says About Your Brain

What Your Typing Style Says About Your Brain

The way you type could reveal a lot about that scrambled omelette you call a brain. Dr. Smartass explains why one common style could be cause for concern.

Double Your Entendre: 12 Unintentionally Dirty Headlines

Double Your Entendre: 12 Unintentionally Dirty Headlines

Do you have a dirty mind? If you interpret these seemingly innocent news headlines the same way we did, the answer is probably yes.

Six Geeky Products You Won’t Want to Miss

Six Geeky Products You Won’t Want to Miss

Seems like every tech company is coming out with non-tech products. From Facebook-inspired body spray to Apple’s magical iGlove, here are six hot products you’ll soon be seeing.

Get Ready for the Wal-Mart Computer Experience

Get Ready for the Wal-Mart Computer Experience

From its impossibly bright color scheme to its mullet-sporting virtual assistant Clipford, the Wal-Mart Computer Experience is expected to be a hit with shoppers nationwide.

This Just In: Men Fake It, Too

This Just In: Men Fake It, Too

Think ladies are the only ones putting on the fake “O”-face? Think again. Dr. Smartass explains.

When Naked Cell Phone Pics Come Back to Haunt You

When Naked Cell Phone Pics Come Back to Haunt You

So you “forgot” to delete those risqué cell phone pics of your ex, and now your new girlfriend’s found them. What do you do?