Fresh Off The Griddle

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Been burned by Match.com? Is eHarmony a bit out of tune? Let our guide help you figure out the right way to read those lonely hearts ads.

10 Ways Twitter Is Like Paris Hilton

10 Ways Twitter Is Like Paris Hilton

Turns out social networks and socialites have plenty of things in common — you know, like how often they go down and how important it is to fill their holes.

Oldest Living Microsoft Fanboy Tells All

Oldest Living Microsoft Fanboy Tells All

When Microsoft gets criticized unfairly on the Net, people like Hyrum Winsocki leap to its defense. eSarcasm gets up close and personal with the original MSFT Fanboy.

Apple Bans Itself From App Store

Apple Bans Itself From App Store

In a never-before-seen move, Apple has just banned itself from its own App Store. “We have determined this company is no longer appropriate,” a notification says.

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eSarcasm Spotlight

5 of the World’s Strangest Cell Phones

5 of the World’s Strangest Cell Phones

A flute phone? A cigarette phone? Yeah — there are some weird mobile devices out there. These are five of the oddest we’ve seen.

Quickies

iToons: iConfess, iRepent

iToons: iConfess, iRepent

Apple’s iPhone has a Catholic confession app — and boy, does it ever make you pay for your sins.

Hump Day Hottie: Justine Ezarik

Hump Day Hottie: Justine Ezarik

Meet the woman better known to Internet fanboyz as iJustine.

iToons: The Evil Genius of WordPress

iToons: The Evil Genius of WordPress

WordPress: brilliant blogging platform, or sadistic plot against humanity?

More Recent Stories

Upgrade Emotions: A Platform-By-Platform Analysis

Upgrade Emotions: A Platform-By-Platform Analysis

Upgrades elicit different emotions for different platforms. This highly scientific chart explains the most common reactions to a new system upgrade from owners of iOS, Android, and Windows devices.

The 18 Commandments of the Internet Comment Troll

The 18 Commandments of the Internet Comment Troll

Internet Comment Trolls, your secrets are out! We’ve uncovered a highly confidential document detailing the rules that guide everything Internet Comment Trolls say and do. An eSarcasm exclusive.

NORAD Accidentally Fires on Santa

NORAD Accidentally Fires on Santa

Air defense command officials say a nuclear missile narrowly avoided taking out Father Christmas this morning as he delivered toys to the children of the Far East. Google may be to blame.

Santa Claus Denies Sexual Harassment Allegations

Santa Claus Denies Sexual Harassment Allegations

Beloved children’s icon vehemently denies charges that he forced elves to sit on his lap and spread their Christmas cheer. An exclusive report.

Scientists Discover New Element Based on Michael Arrington, Apologize Profusely Afterwards

Scientists Discover New Element Based on Michael Arrington, Apologize Profusely Afterwards

Urasium, an ignoble gas based on superheated emissions from the former TechCrunch founder, has become the 116th element in the Periodic Table. A nation of chemists mourn.

Five People You Really Don’t Want to See Naked and Yet Here They Are – Naked

Five People You Really Don’t Want to See Naked and Yet Here They Are – Naked

Even worse, they’re all guys. Can we do SEO or what?

Snowden Meets Seuss: Oh, The Places He’ll Go

Snowden Meets Seuss: Oh, The Places He’ll Go

Where do you go when you’re Edward Snowden? Here’s some advice from the late great Dr. Seuss.


eSarcasm Favorites

Top 10 Things You Didn’t Know About “The Daily”

Top 10 Things You Didn’t Know About “The Daily”

Extra, extra, read all about it. Apple and News Corp have finally unveiled the first ‘newspaper’ for the iPad. Here are ten things they won’t tell you about it.

Chart: The Truth About Twitter’s Traffic

Chart: The Truth About Twitter’s Traffic

Despite reports that Twitter’s traffic is flatlining, a new study says 27 million tweets are being sent every day. So what gives? Here’s a breakdown.

We Deeply Regret Posting Those Naked Photos of You on Facebook

We Deeply Regret Posting Those Naked Photos of You on Facebook

One out of three people regret something they’ve posted on social networks, says a new survey. It gets much, much worse than that. An eSarcasm exclusive report.

This Just In: Men Fake It, Too

This Just In: Men Fake It, Too

Think ladies are the only ones putting on the fake “O”-face? Think again. Dr. Smartass explains.

Double Your Entendre: 12 Unintentionally Dirty Headlines

Double Your Entendre: 12 Unintentionally Dirty Headlines

Do you have a dirty mind? If you interpret these seemingly innocent news headlines the same way we did, the answer is probably yes.

New Online Dating Service Offers Membership Only to Uggos

New Online Dating Service Offers Membership Only to Uggos

Screw BeautifulPeople.com. If your goblin-like appearance frequently frightens small children, AbsoluteUggos may be the dating site for you.

How Sluts are Saving the Species

How Sluts are Saving the Species

The next time you see a girl in a tight shirt and short skirt, you should stop and say thank you — but not for the reason you might expect. Dr. Smartass explains.