Fresh Off The Griddle

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Been burned by Match.com? Is eHarmony a bit out of tune? Let our guide help you figure out the right way to read those lonely hearts ads.

Frak The Shack: 25 Better Ways to Rebrand RadioShack

Frak The Shack: 25 Better Ways to Rebrand RadioShack

RadioShack is attempting to reinvent itself by taking on a new name: “The Shack.” Come on, RS — you can do better than that. Here are 25 more appropriate alternatives.

In the End, We’re All Google Whores

In the End, We’re All Google Whores

What do flaming Care Bears, ninnyhammers, and parakeets with intestinal problems have in common? They’re all disturbing — yet real — Google Trends.

High-Tech Bras: The Breast and the Brightest

High-Tech Bras: The Breast and the Brightest

Tits and tech — what more could a guy want? From an iPod-charging bra to one with its own USB keyboard, these eight pieces of intimate apparel are sure to get any geek’s heart racing.

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eSarcasm Spotlight

When Naked Cell Phone Pics Come Back to Haunt You

When Naked Cell Phone Pics Come Back to Haunt You

So you “forgot” to delete those risqué cell phone pics of your ex, and now your new girlfriend’s found them. What do you do?

Quickies

iToons: How Most People Pick a Smartphone

iToons: How Most People Pick a Smartphone

To iPhone, or to Droid? We geeks may obsess over specs, but most people have a different way of deciding.

Video: Foul-Mouthed Octogenarians Doing Unspeakable Things

Video: Foul-Mouthed Octogenarians Doing Unspeakable Things

If you read eSarcasm, we’re guessing you’re probably not easily offended. Well, this might push you over the edge. This is definitely NSFW. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

Hump Day Hottie: Alicia Rountree-Wilson

Hump Day Hottie: Alicia Rountree-Wilson

The Number One argument for marrying the boss’s daughter: Alicia Rountree-Wilson

Hump Day Hottie: Elizabeth Banks

Hump Day Hottie: Elizabeth Banks

Some banks we wouldn’t mind bailing out. Our favorite one is named Elizabeth.

More Recent Stories

Upgrade Emotions: A Platform-By-Platform Analysis

Upgrade Emotions: A Platform-By-Platform Analysis

Upgrades elicit different emotions for different platforms. This highly scientific chart explains the most common reactions to a new system upgrade from owners of iOS, Android, and Windows devices.

The 18 Commandments of the Internet Comment Troll

The 18 Commandments of the Internet Comment Troll

Internet Comment Trolls, your secrets are out! We’ve uncovered a highly confidential document detailing the rules that guide everything Internet Comment Trolls say and do. An eSarcasm exclusive.

NORAD Accidentally Fires on Santa

NORAD Accidentally Fires on Santa

Air defense command officials say a nuclear missile narrowly avoided taking out Father Christmas this morning as he delivered toys to the children of the Far East. Google may be to blame.

Santa Claus Denies Sexual Harassment Allegations

Santa Claus Denies Sexual Harassment Allegations

Beloved children’s icon vehemently denies charges that he forced elves to sit on his lap and spread their Christmas cheer. An exclusive report.

Scientists Discover New Element Based on Michael Arrington, Apologize Profusely Afterwards

Scientists Discover New Element Based on Michael Arrington, Apologize Profusely Afterwards

Urasium, an ignoble gas based on superheated emissions from the former TechCrunch founder, has become the 116th element in the Periodic Table. A nation of chemists mourn.

Five People You Really Don’t Want to See Naked and Yet Here They Are – Naked

Five People You Really Don’t Want to See Naked and Yet Here They Are – Naked

Even worse, they’re all guys. Can we do SEO or what?

Snowden Meets Seuss: Oh, The Places He’ll Go

Snowden Meets Seuss: Oh, The Places He’ll Go

Where do you go when you’re Edward Snowden? Here’s some advice from the late great Dr. Seuss.


eSarcasm Favorites

The Dark Side of Texting

The Dark Side of Texting

Before you open that next text from your special someone, you may want to read what Dr. Smartass discovered.

Are You Smarter Than a Tea Partier?

Are You Smarter Than a Tea Partier?

Just take this quiz and find out. Don’t worry, there are only 8 questions and they’re all multiple choice. Also: If you don’t, the terror — err, socialists — will win. An eSarcasm exclusive.

7 Simple Rules of Online Dating

7 Simple Rules of Online Dating

Hooking up with someone online doesn’t have to be difficult. Just follow these seven simple rules, and you’ll be clicking your way to climactic glory.

High-Tech Bras: The Breast and the Brightest

High-Tech Bras: The Breast and the Brightest

Tits and tech — what more could a guy want? From an iPod-charging bra to one with its own USB keyboard, these eight pieces of intimate apparel are sure to get any geek’s heart racing.

Christ Renews eSarcasm Endorsement

Christ Renews eSarcasm Endorsement

eSarcasm is pleased to announce the renewed endorsement of Jesus Christ for the year 2010 A.D. “We feel like our business has been resurrected,” the site’s founders say.

Those Hips Don’t Lie: Her Butt and Her Brain

Those Hips Don’t Lie: Her Butt and Her Brain

News flash: There’s more to her derriere than meets the eye. Dr. Smartass dives into some surprising science behind the behind.

Most Influential Tweeters in the Twitterverse

Most Influential Tweeters in the Twitterverse

We’ve discovered the quickest path to becoming a Twitter influencer: Create your own rating system for Twitter influencers.