Fresh Off The Griddle

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Been burned by Match.com? Is eHarmony a bit out of tune? Let our guide help you figure out the right way to read those lonely hearts ads.

Sweet China o’ Mine: The Song

Sweet China o’ Mine: The Song

Our take on the Google-China saga, set to the tune of Guns N’ Roses’ “Sweet Child o’ Mine.”

Police on the Hunt for Elusive ‘Gmail Killer’

Police on the Hunt for Elusive ‘Gmail Killer’

Law enforcement authorities are seeking an alleged serial killer who has threatened to murder Gmail, the iPhone, the Kindle, and Google. An eSarcasm exclusive.

5 Reasons Why We Hate ’5 Reasons Why’ Stories

5 Reasons Why We Hate ’5 Reasons Why’ Stories

Why must so many blog posts revolve around “5 reasons”-this or “5 reasons”-that? How about some originality, people?

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eSarcasm Spotlight

Get Ready for the Wal-Mart Computer Experience

Get Ready for the Wal-Mart Computer Experience

From its impossibly bright color scheme to its mullet-sporting virtual assistant Clipford, the Wal-Mart Computer Experience is expected to be a hit with shoppers nationwide.

Quickies

iToons: Even the Elves Have Hardware Failures

iToons: Even the Elves Have Hardware Failures

They may work for Santa, but the IT elves at the North Pole still have their share of server problems.

Hump Day Hottie: Christian Serratos

Hump Day Hottie: Christian Serratos

This Twilight star shows her love — and a lot more — for the small and the furry.

iToons: About That Free In-Flight Wi-Fi…

iToons: About That Free In-Flight Wi-Fi…

Google’s providing complimentary Wi-Fi on flights this holiday season — but don’t put your wallet away just yet.

Hump Day Hottie: Peyton List

Hump Day Hottie: Peyton List

Need more reasons to watch Mad Men? Here’s number one on our List

More Recent Stories

Upgrade Emotions: A Platform-By-Platform Analysis

Upgrade Emotions: A Platform-By-Platform Analysis

Upgrades elicit different emotions for different platforms. This highly scientific chart explains the most common reactions to a new system upgrade from owners of iOS, Android, and Windows devices.

The 18 Commandments of the Internet Comment Troll

The 18 Commandments of the Internet Comment Troll

Internet Comment Trolls, your secrets are out! We’ve uncovered a highly confidential document detailing the rules that guide everything Internet Comment Trolls say and do. An eSarcasm exclusive.

NORAD Accidentally Fires on Santa

NORAD Accidentally Fires on Santa

Air defense command officials say a nuclear missile narrowly avoided taking out Father Christmas this morning as he delivered toys to the children of the Far East. Google may be to blame.

Santa Claus Denies Sexual Harassment Allegations

Santa Claus Denies Sexual Harassment Allegations

Beloved children’s icon vehemently denies charges that he forced elves to sit on his lap and spread their Christmas cheer. An exclusive report.

Scientists Discover New Element Based on Michael Arrington, Apologize Profusely Afterwards

Scientists Discover New Element Based on Michael Arrington, Apologize Profusely Afterwards

Urasium, an ignoble gas based on superheated emissions from the former TechCrunch founder, has become the 116th element in the Periodic Table. A nation of chemists mourn.

Five People You Really Don’t Want to See Naked and Yet Here They Are – Naked

Five People You Really Don’t Want to See Naked and Yet Here They Are – Naked

Even worse, they’re all guys. Can we do SEO or what?

Snowden Meets Seuss: Oh, The Places He’ll Go

Snowden Meets Seuss: Oh, The Places He’ll Go

Where do you go when you’re Edward Snowden? Here’s some advice from the late great Dr. Seuss.


eSarcasm Favorites

15 Things You Didn’t Know About Facebook

15 Things You Didn’t Know About Facebook

In honor of Facebook’s 500-million member milestone, we offer these fun factoids about the social network everyone either loves or loathes.

Baby, You AutoComplete Me

Baby, You AutoComplete Me

Steve Jobs is a bicycle. Sarah Palin killed Michael Jackson. People type weird shit into Google — and you need look no further than its Auto-Complete feature to get a glimpse.

Are You a Certified Facebook Douche?

Are You a Certified Facebook Douche?

We’re launching a campaign to seek out and identify the world’s worst Certified Facebook Douches. Can you help?

Windows at 25: The Interview

Windows at 25: The Interview

To mark Microsoft Windows’ 25th birthday, we got up close and personal with the OS on a wide range of topics — including what it really thinks of Gates, Ballmer, and Jobs. An eSarcasm exclusive.

Breaking: Google in Discussions to Acquire eSarcasm for $50 or More

Breaking: Google in Discussions to Acquire eSarcasm for $50 or More

The search giant is once again in talks to engulf and devour eSarcasm in a deal valued at nearly three figures, sources report. An eSarcasm exclusive.

The 10 Dumbest Questions People Ask on Quora

The 10 Dumbest Questions People Ask on Quora

Of course, there are no stupid questions, just stupid people. And many of them are on Quora, the newest social media darling. What the frak is Quora? Don’t ask us.

A World Without Microsoft

A World Without Microsoft

From better access to boobies to more annoying infomercials, the world would be a drastically different place had Microsoft never come around.