Fresh Off The Griddle

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Been burned by Match.com? Is eHarmony a bit out of tune? Let our guide help you figure out the right way to read those lonely hearts ads.

Frak The Shack: 25 Better Ways to Rebrand RadioShack

Frak The Shack: 25 Better Ways to Rebrand RadioShack

RadioShack is attempting to reinvent itself by taking on a new name: “The Shack.” Come on, RS — you can do better than that. Here are 25 more appropriate alternatives.

Internet Explorer 6 Found Brutally Murdered

Internet Explorer 6 Found Brutally Murdered

Microsoft’s Internet Explorer 6 browser has been found brutally murdered, police confirm. The browser had been the target of malicious attacks for years.

Myspace to Launch Its Own Smartphone, Sources Say

Myspace to Launch Its Own Smartphone, Sources Say

The Facebook phone may be a no-go, but another social network is building its own device. Ladies and gentlemen, meet the Myspace phone.

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eSarcasm Spotlight

5 of the World’s Strangest Cell Phones

5 of the World’s Strangest Cell Phones

A flute phone? A cigarette phone? Yeah — there are some weird mobile devices out there. These are five of the oddest we’ve seen.

Quickies

iToons: A Different Kind of Death Grip

iToons: A Different Kind of Death Grip

As many young men have learned, smartphones aren’t the only things that suffer when gripped too firmly.

Hump Day Hottie: Melissa Rycroft

Hump Day Hottie: Melissa Rycroft

We’ll take a salami on Rycroft, hold the mustard. Thank you.

iToons: Meet Microsoft’s ‘Christmas Screen of Death’

iToons: Meet Microsoft’s ‘Christmas Screen of Death’

What better way to say “happy holidays” than with a Christmas-themed death screen from Microsoft?

Hump Day Hottie: Haley Higgins

Hump Day Hottie: Haley Higgins

This blonde stunner has something she really needs to get off her chest

More Recent Stories

Upgrade Emotions: A Platform-By-Platform Analysis

Upgrade Emotions: A Platform-By-Platform Analysis

Upgrades elicit different emotions for different platforms. This highly scientific chart explains the most common reactions to a new system upgrade from owners of iOS, Android, and Windows devices.

The 18 Commandments of the Internet Comment Troll

The 18 Commandments of the Internet Comment Troll

Internet Comment Trolls, your secrets are out! We’ve uncovered a highly confidential document detailing the rules that guide everything Internet Comment Trolls say and do. An eSarcasm exclusive.

NORAD Accidentally Fires on Santa

NORAD Accidentally Fires on Santa

Air defense command officials say a nuclear missile narrowly avoided taking out Father Christmas this morning as he delivered toys to the children of the Far East. Google may be to blame.

Santa Claus Denies Sexual Harassment Allegations

Santa Claus Denies Sexual Harassment Allegations

Beloved children’s icon vehemently denies charges that he forced elves to sit on his lap and spread their Christmas cheer. An exclusive report.

Scientists Discover New Element Based on Michael Arrington, Apologize Profusely Afterwards

Scientists Discover New Element Based on Michael Arrington, Apologize Profusely Afterwards

Urasium, an ignoble gas based on superheated emissions from the former TechCrunch founder, has become the 116th element in the Periodic Table. A nation of chemists mourn.

Five People You Really Don’t Want to See Naked and Yet Here They Are – Naked

Five People You Really Don’t Want to See Naked and Yet Here They Are – Naked

Even worse, they’re all guys. Can we do SEO or what?

Snowden Meets Seuss: Oh, The Places He’ll Go

Snowden Meets Seuss: Oh, The Places He’ll Go

Where do you go when you’re Edward Snowden? Here’s some advice from the late great Dr. Seuss.


eSarcasm Favorites

The Real Anatomy of a Twitter Whale

The Real Anatomy of a Twitter Whale

Strap on your scuba gear, kiddos: It’s time for a lesson in Twitter biology.

Wear a Condom, Save a Polar Bear

Wear a Condom, Save a Polar Bear

An environmental science group wants us all to have sex to help save endangered animals. This is one mission we can definitely get behind.

Looking for Porn in All the Wrong Places and Other Google Search Stories

Looking for Porn in All the Wrong Places and Other Google Search Stories

Google wants you to share your ‘search story’ with the world on YouTube. After seeing some of our search stories, they might just change their minds.

Quiz: Are You a Total Tech Douchebag?

Quiz: Are You a Total Tech Douchebag?

Alert! Alert! Tech douchebaggery levels are reaching all-time highs. So how much of a total tech douche are you? Take our highly scientific quiz to find out.

OMG, Twitter’s Found Jesus

OMG, Twitter’s Found Jesus

A new Web site called Christian Chirp claims to be the Twitter for the God-fearing masses. Here are 20 ways “tweeting for Jesus” is just a bit different.

The SexBox: 10 X-Rated Games We Want to See

The SexBox: 10 X-Rated Games We Want to See

A Silicon Valley company wants to create an adult gaming system called the SexBox. From “No Need For Speed” to “Panty Raider,” here are 10 X-rated games we hope it will offer.

7 Reasons Why Google Would Make a Bad Boyfriend

7 Reasons Why Google Would Make a Bad Boyfriend

Yeah, yeah, we know. Google’s got it goin’ on. Before you hop on to ride the Big G’s big index, though, you may want to read this.