Fresh Off The Griddle

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Been burned by Match.com? Is eHarmony a bit out of tune? Let our guide help you figure out the right way to read those lonely hearts ads.

12 Great Tweets Throughout the Ages

12 Great Tweets Throughout the Ages

Think Twitter is only four years old? History’s greatest figures have been tweeting for centuries. Here’s what Jesus, Genghis Khan, Napoleon, & others had to say (in 140 characters or less).

Top 15 Reasons MySpace Picked That Terrible Logo

Top 15 Reasons MySpace Picked That Terrible Logo

The new MySpace logo may look like a total joke, but that’s probably just because you don’t know the whole story behind it. Behold: the 15 real reasons MySpace went with that godawful design.

The Real Color of Attraction

The Real Color of Attraction

When it comes to attraction, there’s only one color you need to remember. Dr. Smartass explains the science behind the palette of love.

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eSarcasm Spotlight

7 Reasons Why Google Would Make a Bad Boyfriend

7 Reasons Why Google Would Make a Bad Boyfriend

Yeah, yeah, we know. Google’s got it goin’ on. Before you hop on to ride the Big G’s big index, though, you may want to read this.

Quickies

Video: A Message From Steve Jobs About Android and the White iPhone

Video: A Message From Steve Jobs About Android and the White iPhone

The Magical One himself took time out of his busy schedule to deliver this important video message.

Hump Day Hottie: Penelope Cruz

Hump Day Hottie: Penelope Cruz

Whenever this sexy Spanish siren appears, our screens are set to Cruz Control.

iToons: Even the Easter Bunny Suffers From Technology Fail

iToons: Even the Easter Bunny Suffers From Technology Fail

No one’s immune to the breakdown of modern technology — not even the world’s most famously festive bunny.

Video: Foul-Mouthed Octogenarians Doing Unspeakable Things

Video: Foul-Mouthed Octogenarians Doing Unspeakable Things

If you read eSarcasm, we’re guessing you’re probably not easily offended. Well, this might push you over the edge. This is definitely NSFW. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

More Recent Stories

Upgrade Emotions: A Platform-By-Platform Analysis

Upgrade Emotions: A Platform-By-Platform Analysis

Upgrades elicit different emotions for different platforms. This highly scientific chart explains the most common reactions to a new system upgrade from owners of iOS, Android, and Windows devices.

The 18 Commandments of the Internet Comment Troll

The 18 Commandments of the Internet Comment Troll

Internet Comment Trolls, your secrets are out! We’ve uncovered a highly confidential document detailing the rules that guide everything Internet Comment Trolls say and do. An eSarcasm exclusive.

NORAD Accidentally Fires on Santa

NORAD Accidentally Fires on Santa

Air defense command officials say a nuclear missile narrowly avoided taking out Father Christmas this morning as he delivered toys to the children of the Far East. Google may be to blame.

Santa Claus Denies Sexual Harassment Allegations

Santa Claus Denies Sexual Harassment Allegations

Beloved children’s icon vehemently denies charges that he forced elves to sit on his lap and spread their Christmas cheer. An exclusive report.

Scientists Discover New Element Based on Michael Arrington, Apologize Profusely Afterwards

Scientists Discover New Element Based on Michael Arrington, Apologize Profusely Afterwards

Urasium, an ignoble gas based on superheated emissions from the former TechCrunch founder, has become the 116th element in the Periodic Table. A nation of chemists mourn.

Five People You Really Don’t Want to See Naked and Yet Here They Are – Naked

Five People You Really Don’t Want to See Naked and Yet Here They Are – Naked

Even worse, they’re all guys. Can we do SEO or what?

Snowden Meets Seuss: Oh, The Places He’ll Go

Snowden Meets Seuss: Oh, The Places He’ll Go

Where do you go when you’re Edward Snowden? Here’s some advice from the late great Dr. Seuss.


eSarcasm Favorites

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Truth in Online Dating: A Translation Guide

Been burned by Match.com? Is eHarmony a bit out of tune? Let our guide help you figure out the right way to read those lonely hearts ads.

‘Everyone Loves AT&T’ and Other Ridiculous Research

‘Everyone Loves AT&T’ and Other Ridiculous Research

If you believe some recent research claiming most customers actually love AT&T, you’ll probably believe these equally absurd studies compiled by our own Dr. Smartass, too.

Mythical Lesbians Are Breaking the Internets

Mythical Lesbians Are Breaking the Internets

Imaginary sex-crazed lesbians are bringing the Web to a standstill in Sweden. If that sentence doesn’t intrigue you, we’re not sure what will.

15 Things You Didn’t Know About Facebook

15 Things You Didn’t Know About Facebook

In honor of Facebook’s 500-million member milestone, we offer these fun factoids about the social network everyone either loves or loathes.

Which Social Network Is Right For You?

Which Social Network Is Right For You?

According to a new study by Nielsen, preppies flock to Facebook while greasers mingle on MySpace. But where should the rest of us go? Here’s a handy guide.

EXCLUSIVE: iPhone 5 to Include ‘Invisible Fence’ Protection

EXCLUSIVE: iPhone 5 to Include ‘Invisible Fence’ Protection

Following the implementation of tamper-resistant screws on its products, Apple will begin installing electric fences on iPhones to prevent users from opening the cases.

Police on the Hunt for Elusive ‘Gmail Killer’

Police on the Hunt for Elusive ‘Gmail Killer’

Law enforcement authorities are seeking an alleged serial killer who has threatened to murder Gmail, the iPhone, the Kindle, and Google. An eSarcasm exclusive.